Just to look back one more time … I present to you, my timeline of wtf.
The first bit:
- Sept 14 2017 – routine mammogram #squished
- Sept 21 – mag view mammogram (to get a better look, ya know?) #surewhynot
- Oct 6 – biopsy #holyshitthatsawkward
- Oct 19 – family doc reads results – CANCER. No biggie, I figure. I can deal. #cancerwtfareyoukiddingme
- Oct 24 – surgeon appt – omg so HOT. phew. #silverlining #thereisagod
- Oct 31 – MRI – met mr. lorazepam – weeeeee #notanaddict
- Nov 17 – surgery – bi-lateral mastectomy – 53 staples, 2 drains and ms. oxy – weeeeee #thatsgoodshit #ihavesomeleft
- Nov 23 – drains out – NASTY NASTY #justtrytorelax #didntpunchherout
- Nov 27 – staples out – omg noooooooo – #breathebreathenamaste
- Dec 7 – hot surgeon reads path reports – lymph nodes negative YAHOOOOO but not so fast he says, you’ll hear from an onc soon… #soonmeansnothing #merrychristmas
The Next Bit:
- Dec 29 – fast talking, eye rolling oncologist explains treatment plan #shedidntbreathe #wedrovetothedirtyshwaforthis
- Jan 4, 2018 – MUGA scan (heart test) #meh
- Jan 9 – portacath insertion – FASCINATING #heyicanfeelthat
- Jan 10 – first chemo #icandothis #circlebackwiththosecookieswouldya
- weeks and weeks and weeks of awesome friends visiting and sending me shit, and me doing my damnedest to mitigate some rather nasty side effects #loveyoupeople #chemosucks
- March 6 – Jenny shaved my head! #liberated #peoplelookbetterwithhair
- March 14 – 10% reduction of chemo due to neuropathy development in hands & feet – I start freezing my extremities with ice – people stare #shutupimbeingproactive
- March 28 – last chemo WOOT WOOT – feel like shit, but so happy it will be downhill from here – EXHAUSTED #imisswinesomuch
The last bit:
- April 15 – heart attack WTF?? (It really does feel like your chest is in a vice. And it’s hard to breathe. NASTY NASTY) #shouldhavecalledanambulance #itwasnttheavocado
- April 17 – angiogram to confirm SCAD “Spontaneous Coronary Artery Dissection” – it’s a thing #lookitup
- April 24 – meet with stern oncologist who I notice thinks with her eyes shut – no Herceptin for me until she talks to my cardiologist (ya, well, I don’t have one… OMG REALLY?) #idontwanttorestanymore #fuckoff
- May 6 – Hike for Hospice (in a wheelchair, but I did it!) – My team raised over $11,000 WOOT WOOT – I love my peeps #fundraisingwin #dontaskmetodothisnextyear
The final straw bit:
- May 7 – @ 2 am I start passing a kidney stone – think I’m dying – mr. morphine saved my ass – SWEEEEEET – CAT scan confirmed it #thankspaulforholdingmypukecontainer
- May 10 – cardiac ultrasound – technician is no nonsense – asked her to ultrasound my boob bumps – NOT IMPRESSED WITH ME #omgsofunnyinmyhead
- May 11 – kidney stone expelled – the mother fucker had two sharp points #shouldibronzeit
- May 15 – met with oncologist who actually smiled (maybe she thinks I deserve ONE smile) – clears me for treatment and agrees to send my kidney stone off for analysis #inquiringmindswanttoknow #heyyoudidsomethingnice
- May 16 (tomorrow)- Herceptin resumes (this is my 6th treatment) – have to have a loading dose again because it’s been 6 weeks since my last treatment (double the amount and a 1 hour observation period CRAPPY but I like the chemo suite … free cookies, ya know?) #petitioningfororeos
So the breast removal is done, the chemo is done, the heart attack is done, the kidney stone is done. All I have left is my targeted therapy, Herceptin. I continue to get it every 3 weeks till I have had a total of 18 treatments. In order to make it fun I have decided to take the remaining number of treats to the nurses. 12 tomorrow – a dozen of blueberrry muffins, me thinks (last time it was 13 chocolate dipped oreos! NOM NOM). #gottamakeyourownfun
The only other thing is, well, recovery. I somehow keep forgetting that I’m actually IN recovery. Both from the chemo and now the heart attack. So ya, being slow and tired is the new normal and being patient with it all is also pretty new. #workingonit
Thanks for all of the lovingkindness. Strength in numbers, I say! #peaceout
Jesus- what a path. What a story. What a woman.
You amaze and inspire me my friend.
#imsogladihaveyou
#backatcha
The chronology is accurate to be sure. What is missing however is the strength and passion for living that define you. Throughout these tribulations you have remained an amazing mother, an incredible partner and an inspiring friend. I love who you are, and truly believe you make all of us better people.
AN INSPIRATION FOR SURE. YOU ROCK !
You nailed it, Paul! She does make us all better, and she makes us laugh and cry (sometimes at the same time). I think we need to create an interactive timeline, including the hashtags, Janice (the dirty shwa tag is my favourite) . You continue to amaze me. You are my definition of resilient.
So, I’m at a job interview, and I Ask one of the interviewers if she walked with you the day before, and she’s like “yeah, and now she’s got a kidney stone”, and I’m like “I know, right?”. The wonders of digital communication – we can all commiserate with you!
Glad you enjoyed my hashtag humour! It seemed a good way to add my innermost thoughts on each topic…
Well, that was quite a chapter…I hope the next one is a little more boring!! All that aside, you are nothing short of AMAZING! Love you!
Wishing you all the best. You have been through quite a journey! Your strength and sense of humour is amazing. You are an inspiration and a true definition of the power of grit.
Hugs
Thanks for the chronology, Sweetie. I am continually amazed by your resilience. I am coming to give you a big hug someday soon. I promise.
The chronicle is amazing. And especially your incredible spirit. All of that and still $11k+ for Hospice!! #wordsdefyloveyou.
Janice! I saw your Aunt Donna at the golf course last week and she told me about what you’ve been going through and referred me to your blog (which I found yesterday and binge read every single one of your posts into the night). I am so so sorry that you have been going through such an unbelievable battle (like a BOSS, I might add). I hope and pray that the worst is behind you and your future is filled with great health and tremendous love and happiness. I wish I’d found this blog sooner, I would have joined you in your Hospice fundraising walk. <3
I have to tell you how much I have adored reading your posts. Love your humour and your insights and your vulnerability too. Annie and Liam (and Bree) are beautiful… has it really been 10 years since you were here with them?
You write so true to your spirit. I could hear your voice through your written words (although I don't remember your love of the F bomb!). It felt like you were sitting in my kitchen with a glass of wine telling me about the kids, Paul, baking, tiling, quilting, making maple syrup, summer at the cabin, being a Principal….you are nothing short of amazing… and even despite your incredible challenges of the past months, although your tone certainly changed, your humour, curiosity, bravery and passion for life came through in your words. Clearly from your heart, maybe with a little extra sass! You are a born story teller, my friend. Grace, grit, brains and beauty!! I truly believe that those that shared the suite with you, in brown or beige chairs, must have thought that you were their silver lining. Hair or not, I know your smile and compassion and humour must have been a bright light in each of their days.
Hope we can get together soon. I'd be happy to ride the 401 and visit some day when you are up to it. I miss your big heart and your sweet old soul. Sending super big HUGS and healing energy! XOXO
PS. The skin head pic in the ER is my personal favourite pic of you. Nice boots!!